I wanted to take a second at the start of the my blog 6 (Can you
believe I have almost written for a whole week already???? I am so proud of
myself!!), by saying that this is a blog to force myself to start feeling pride
in all I do accomplish and start appreciating myself. However, it is also a
blog about me, I mean you can't just share what you plan on doing that day and
the next day and what you did the day before without sharing yourself. So, my
life is a crazy whirlwind right now, last night I borrowed money from a friend
and scraped together money and drove the hour to get to the girl I mentors
Birthday party. Backstory: I made a present for her (un upcycled belt in her
school colors and school logo), however, I made the wrong school since she
lives in one part but goes to school in another. I felt awful because I was so
proud of it. (Making a tab belt is not so much hard as annoying. It is lots of
tabs and lots of time) I felt so bad that when I got home I immediately started
working on a new one, I worked for three hours on it and when I finished I knew
I had to go down and give her the right one.
So, Fish moved around money and
after the money I borrowed from my awesome friend (plus the leftover he threw
in for Fish's dinner, since he made me dinner while I was at his house), I was
able to scrap together the money to go down. Even though I had stayed up WAY
too late and only got about 4 hours of sleep, I was so excited. I called the restaurant
during my lunch and told them to add an extra spot but not tell them, they told
me that that had a booth and an extra table for two people to sit away from the
party. Weird I thought, but oh well, I'm going to surprise her. So, I drive
down, get there and not only is she not surprised to see me, she looks down
right angry that I am there. Her mom said I could sit with her at the other
table or I could sit with them, I was then told I would be sitting with her
mom. So, I wanted to leave, I texted Fish and he said to try and have fun since
we spent the money to get there. I had a wonderful time with her mom but
everything with her was forced by her
mother. Even when I was leaving she just reached her hand out and her mom made
her get up and give me a hug and take a photo, which I did not want to do.
While she was up she proceeded to tell me she knew I was coming and she thought
I was going to be hiding and popping out. Then I realized that that second
person was me. She knew she wouldn't be talking with me at all that night. She
thought I was playing with her when I said I had no money and couldn't make it
down. She had no idea how much I sacrificed and did in order to be there for
her day.
So, in the end I think I am done with her. Now I know damned well that
she is a child and all her texts, since she send me 4 since go from apologizing
to me for making me upset to flat out saying she did nothing wrong and that she
is just a kid. So, now she will get a nice dose of reality adult style. I also
know that part of this is misplaced emotions because my job ends on Thursday
and I am very upset because I am going to really miss those kids and I don't
think I will ever see them again because I can't just drive 40 minutes for one
day of work. :-( I also know that it has been building up with me feeling very
underappreciated by my friends. When I identify you as my friend I mean I will
bend over backwards for you and I think it is just sad that I have so very few
of them. OK, so enough of all that shitty life crap. This weekend is going to
be very productive and I plan on really accomplishing a lot and also having so
much fun!
What I Have Accomplished:
- Drove to Bloomington
- Buy
crickets
- Finish
the day
- Start
the Weekend
- Surprise
my friend (well not technically but I did show up)
- Emailed
photos from party to my friend's mom
- Sent
a thank you email to my Kindergarten teacher for her awesome present
What
I Hope To Accomplish Today:
(Move
Overs From Yesterday :)
- Wash
blankets and rug
- Translate
Japanese Letter **
- Pick
Insurance Company
- Move
box to Basement
- Search
for jobs **
**Long Term Goals
New
For Tonight/Tomorrow morning
- Continue
to work on flat color
- Make
5 copies of notes (Monday)
- Research
Surprise
- Create
Surprise Page
- Make
Surprise Logo
- Go
through the mail
- Clean
the Living Room
-
Start to make my costume
- Organize
cupcake supplies and containers
- Figure
out Car light situation
-
Watch Grimm
- Organize
supplies for upcycling
- Store
MIL's blankets
- Sweep
the house
-
Take a Bath
- Shave
- Try
and Relax a bit and not be so upset
-
Organize closet
- Work
on Guest Room
-
Make Budget for Nov 15th check
- Go
to Clinic and see about what they can do
-
Go grocery shopping (this weekend)
-
Buy a bag for the quilt
I am having such a hard time thinking of all the things I want
to do this weekend, it is so hard because I know that I want to have fun and I
also know that I will be doing so much that I have no included above, so I will
try and make little notes on what I do that is not on this list so that
tomorrow I can post about all that I actually did! :-P Thank you again for reading my boring blog, especially
with there being actual events to talk about at the beginning!! ^_^
Love Always,
Jettychan
Break down of plans for tonight: Work on the house for the
party, have fun and paint on my quilt!
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